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Where to begin? I didn't choose life as a holy prophet to Scott Bakula, it just seems that fate put me in the right place at the right time. I grew up in Florida, a place where all that wholesome Disney shit can begin to grind on you after a while. But after college, the incredible power of Scott compelled me to move to Seattle, a place where I would be absolutely sure to find the kind of unique people who would be ready to help me to launch this fine cult.
I met High Priestess Sharona first, a few months after I moved here. It was definitely Scott's will that I should get to know such a person. While college life may have left me partially insane, it was definitely the contribution from Sharona in the form of her "possessed" behavior in public and her insanely mixed margaritas which helped push me over the edge of sanity into that special zone which is occupied by true believers in the power of the Bakula. Gaze deeply into her eyes in the photo to the right and you will see what I am talking about...
With friends like these, how could I not form a cult?
Prophet Patsy was the next eccentric which I met in the Seattle area. She showed me the first glimpses of enlightenment (via her tits). Needless to say, this had a great impact on me. The Bakula commands us to listen to any and all topless women. In fact, as is mentioned on the history page, when the Bakula first spoke to me, it compelled me to acquire His divine image to give to Patsy as a gift. Truly, this was a sign not to be taken lightly.
"I always have confidence, thanks to the power of Scott Bakula."
But I would not reach the pinnacle of enlightenment until I met Prophet Chikinhed, which was a meeting which could only have been caused by the strange and chaotic power of Scott Bakula.
Thanks to the efforts of the two of us, we have been able to spread Scott's Divine Dysfunction throughout the entire Seattle area, and beyond, to other parts of the world.
Now, when I am not helping coordinate the activities of this great cult, I enjoy hanging out with "friends of the cult," and anyone else who is crazy enough to have me around. I also am an addict to Sealab 2021 and Aqua Teen Hunger Force, which are cartoons clearly inspired by the Bakula.
I'm also a bit of a techno geek, so I also enjoy trying to use technology to spread the word of the cult further and further. For instance, it was my suggestion to make this fine web site, and I helped to inspire the other cult members to put in their fair share of detail on this site. Clearly, the results speak for themselves...
PROPHET Duckman feels the rapture of Scott Bakula coursing through his body thanks to the assistance of SubGenii
PRAISE SCOTT BAKULA!
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